21 Jump Street (2012)

Like many of my critical brethren, I’m sick of retreads, remakes, reboots, re-imaginings, etc.  You put a re in front of whatever you want to label the movie as, chances are good that I’m not going to be interested in your … well, if I was a politically incorrect person, I’d say “retarded movie” but I’m not so I’ll say “creatively disabled” instead.  I like Jonah Hill though, and I thought at the very least it would be good for some humour.  I never watched the original “21 Jump Street” TV show much, but from what I remember of it, it was on the air because Johnny Depp was a heartthrob and that’s about it.  I vaguely recall the ethnic variety that was displayed at all times in the casting, and that it seemed to be pretty boring.  Also, I remember Peter DeLuise making himself throw up in a toilet once.

Hill co-wrote the story with Michael Bacall (who has a co-writing credit on one of my favourite movies of all time, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World which I just found out so that’s cool too), and it was intended as a Bad Boys-esque John Hughes movie and that is a pretty spot on representation of the movie.  It’s got the touchy-feely parts, and it’s got the insane action, mixed in with a bit of Superbad style comedic timing.  The entire premise is lifted directly from the original TV show, with new police recruits Morton Schmidt (Hill) and Greg Jenko (Channing Tatum) basically screwing up their first arrest attempt and getting busted down to the high school undercover project because they look young.

I thoroughly enjoyed the film, as it was clearly intended to be an R-rated action pic, with tonnes of filthy language and situations.  I’m sure at some point, the studio wanted the movie to be PG-13 and much more marketable, but that would have essentially been castrating the creativity of the film.  There are numerous talented actors and actresses throughout the whole movie, and some vaguely surprising cameo performances, and everyone has fun with what little screen time they might have.  I would easily plunk down money for a movie based on Nick Offerman’s character busting the balls of everyone that comes into his office.

Solidly enjoyable, completely surprising to me.  I even enjoyed Channing Tatum… but I’ll probably never ever see Magic Mike.

4 / 5

Bridesmaids (2011)

I have had a crush on Kristen Wiig since the first time I saw her, on the awesomely underrated “Joe Schmo” show.  She’s funny, intelligent, self-deprecating, and gorgeous.  Seriously, if you don’t think Wiig is beautiful, you have unrealistic expectations of females and fuck off, nobody likes you.  Probably.  Anyways, she co-wrote this movie, and the wonderful Paul Feig directed it, and it was produced by Judd Apatow, so I had high expectations for it right off the bat.  Actually, when Thor came out, I wanted to see Bridesmaids instead, but nooooo the girl that I was going with wanted to see meaty superhero guys.  I didn’t get any action from that lil’ whatever they call it, not a date, but hanging out or, whatever.

Basically, this whole write-up could boil down to “OMG srsly guise, it’s soooo good!!!”  because one exclamation point is never enough and extraneous vowels are not needed (except in the word “so”).  I have nothing at all bad to say about the movie, other than it was a tad long (and that feels just nitpicky, because two hours is a decent length, right ladies?  RIGHT LADIES?).  All the supporting cast embraced their roles to perfection, namely the much-lauded scene-stealer Melissa McCarthy.  Oh and the awesome Jon Hamm, a right proper douchebag.

It’s not a revolutionary film in the execution or acting or comedy or anything, but I hope it is seen as a warning shot, wake-up call for Hollywood.  We shouldn’t have to suffer through 27 Dresses, Sweet Home Alabama or anything like that that diminishes how fuckin’ raunchy and real women can be.  And it’s not just raunch, it’s that hey, those people with boobs are people too, and a lot of them are fuckin’ funny.  I lost track of where I was going with this, but more please!

4.5 / 5