American Reunion (2012)

I attended my 10-year high school reunion, and let me tell you, there were many emotions going through me leading up to it.  I was excited to see a lot of people that I had not seen for years, in some cases since high school.  But – much like my current situation – I didn’t feel like I’d made anything of my life, that I was just coasting from job to job, single man, no kids, not even a pet back then.  My hairline had receded, but other than that I looked pretty much the same with an added beard.  I didn’t have to travel for the reunion, I still lived in Calgary at the time.  For me it was both a letdown and a cheerful experience, because not everyone was as “cool” as you remembered them, and a lot of people had swelled since high school.  Thanks to my weird metabolism, I had neither grown nor shrunk (except for my hairline) and overall I went away from the reunion feeling alright about myself.  Which is more than I can say for this movie.

If you’ve seen the first three movies and have an aching desire to depress yourself, I highly recommend American Reunion.  It’s a great way to kill all those past happy memories you might have about the gang from American Pie 1 and 2, and even when they grew up just a little for American Wedding and January Jones wasn’t a stuck up bitch character.  I don’t know where I’m going with this, and I don’t think it matters because if you saw the first three movies, wait I already did that part, AND I HAVE LEARNED FROM IT.

Pretty much the same stuff that happen in the trilogy happens in this movie.  There’s very little to recommend about it (other than inflicting depression upon yourself if that’s what you’re looking for), but I will give John Cho credit for making a real character out of the guy who brought the term “MILF” to the world.  Also, Rebecca De Mornay still looks gorgeous, but yeah, I have happier memories about my own slightly melancholic high school reunion than I do of this movie.  The whole movie can be summed up as “Kids are different now and we’re old, DERP DERP”.  Also, Thomas Ian Nicholas is still a creepy, smarmy douchebag-looking dude.

1.5 / 5

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas (2011)

This shouldn’t take too long.  If you’ve seen the first two Harold & Kumar movies, you kind of know exactly what sort of movie you’re in store for with the third installment.  I didn’t have a chance to check it out before Christmas 2011 so you’re getting my review now.  It’s a fairly festive Christmas-themed movie, while also introducing new characters into the H&K universe, and also revisiting old familiar faces.

If you’re seeing it in 3D, well congratulations, you’ll be getting an additional dimension of humour that is merely hinted at in the 2D version.  That’s the inherent problem with intended 3D movies, when you’re relying on that gimmick and the gimmick isn’t available, the movie suffers for it.  As a rarely-partaker, I’m sure there’s loads of “pot humour” that is gut-bustingly funny as well, but for me it just garnered an unknowing nod of acknowledgment if that makes any sense at all.

Oh yeah, and if you didn’t see the end credits of H&K2, Neil Patrick Harris (Neil Patrick Harris, the distinction needs to be made) survived and shows up for his trademark scene destroying with awesome appearance.  This time he brings his husband, David Burtka (David Burtka) along for the fun, and that whole sequence was easily the most entertaining of the entire movie.  Oh and Waffle-Bot was fucking awesome.

3 / 5